Happy Birthday Again, Tom

It seems minutes after the china dishes are back in the china box and I've cleared the table from Thanksgiving dinner, it's time to celebrate Tom's birthday. 

In the early hours on Dec. 4th, I stumbled to the kitchen to cook bacon and eggs for the traditional birthday breakfast in bed. While I waited on the bacon, I triple-checked this new cake recipe one last time making sure I had enough ingredients. This year I made Tom a carrot cheesecake. 

It's made in layers starting with the cheesecake layer, which if you've never made cheesecake in a water bath you might not understand why I'm making such a big deal out of this cake. Trust me. 

Before eating the cake, I had the boys clear the counters, bring in twinkle lights, and a neutral backdrop, so I could capture proof of all the effort this sucker took. Cake, cheesecake, cake, and then surrounded in cream cheese frosting, it did not disappoint anyone.

We ate at the new restaurant around the corner called the Tavern for the first time for Tom's birthday. We got the nachos appetizer to share and then I had the chicken and potatoes. We finished the night watching a movie together. Tom opened a new lighted magnifying glass for tying flies and I gifted him a coupon for a home massage just like every birthday since I learn to massage in California. (2012) We love and appreciate you, Tom. 

Thanksgiving 2020

My mom wrote about our family Thanksgiving holidays in her journal but she didn't go into detail about any special traditions or the food we would eat and there are no pictures that I know of. I have some of her recipes but none of them are Thanksgiving-themed. 

When we lived in California, Tom's mom Linda would cook and bake traditional food most years. After we moved to Texas, I cooked and hosted Thanksgiving several times but I remember once we went to my dad's house near Fort Worth, TX and everyone brought sides to share. 

Last Thanksgiving was our first Thanksgiving in Idaho. We celebrated with my son-in-law's grandpa and his whole family. Due to COVID-19 this year, Thanksgiving at grandpa Rex's was canceled, but Makayla and Nick came up from Utah and I prepared the dinner. 

We ate:
Turkey
Turkey Legs
Ham
Mashed potatoes
Gravy
Twice-baked potatoes (Nick's grandma's recipe)
Macaroni (Nick's grandma's recipe)
Orange Rolls (Nick's grandma's recipe)
Punch (Nick's grandma's recipe)
Sweet potatoes
Stuffing
Rolls
Chocolate Pie
Pumpkin Pie
Cheesecake
Pecan Pie (store-bought)

The number of COVID cases was increasing in both Utah and Idaho. There was a lot of public debate about gatherings and holiday travel but ultimately I'm so glad Makayla and Nick were able to come, celebrate the holiday, and say good-bye to Matthew before he leaves on his mission. 

(Makayla hugging Matthew good-bye for 2 years :)

Last Man Over the Wall

Facebook Post 11/22/2020

I give thanks that Tom knows how to change a tire. Tom and I met Brian and his broken-down car last night. Tom is kind and good and generous to help others.

Have you ever seen those team-building activities where a large team of people has to work together to get everyone over a 20-foot wall? Well someone has to be the last person over. Someone has to make sure no one is left behind. And then being last, that person also has to have enough strength and ingenuity to get themselves over the wall without the help of a team below to lift up.

I give thanks that Tom is that person. In times of stress, in challenges, or in support of a good cause, you can count on Tom's courage, strength, and ingenuity. The boys call him dad. I call him clutch. Makayla knows he's the first to answer when she calls. We love you Tom Curtis.

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What I Learned About Sincerity

The only constant thing in my early years was ambiguity. I learned to be hyper-observant and imitate behaviors I saw being rewarded. But more than that, I learned to imitate behaviors that avoided punishment at all costs. 

Like on my eighth birthday, I'd seen enough to know not to show my disappointment when I didn't get the  Cabbage Patch Kid Doll I wanted. My neighbor sewed me a doll that she tried to make look like a cabbage patch kid.  

With all eyes on me and with forced expression, I unwrapped the doll and immediately hugged it to my chest partly to show appreciation and excitement and partly to hide the doll. It had frightening asymmetrical eyes that would have looked big on a giant and it had a weirdly misshaped body. The doll smelled like my neighbor's house and her house smelled like a funeral home to me; overwhelmingly flowery and slightly offensive. 

(I finally got a true and real Cabbage Patch Kid Doll for my 12th birthday. Honestly, I think it took my mom 4 years to save up to buy one ;)

At eight, I was mastering my display of publicly approved attitudes and fooled the audience. My performances are not always as favorable as this, though.

Recently during family scripture study the week Matt turned 18, Tom mentioned something about Matthew getting the Melchizedek Priesthood. I observed the emphasis he used when he spoke and I paused to ponder its significance. 

My conspicuous blank stare interrupted our study and instead of seeking approval through pretending, I chose to be sincere and admit my obvious lack of priesthood knowledge and comprehension. 

And then I pinned a prayer to my heart.

Not a week later, I was rewarded for my sincerity with tender mercy and understanding I had never had before about the high priesthood. Our family was reading in Alma 4 where Alma gave up his judgment seat to serve by confining "...himself wholly to the high priesthood of the holy order of God." 

Through our study and reading, I was taught about the high priesthood Alma had received and was using. I learned that the high priesthood was what Alma used to preach the word of God, pull down the word of God, and bear testimony according to revelation and prophecy. 

What seemed indifferent to me before now was very meaningful particularly since Matthew was preparing to confine himself wholly to his mission through the high priesthood just like Alma.

This answer to my prayer came to me well before I witnessed Matthew receive the high priesthood on Nov. 22, 2020, through a blessing given by Tom in our living room where Travis and another brother from the high council stood. The spirit was strong and while I didn't feel the presence of Alma during the blessing, I don't doubt his spirit was there.